Letter of Advice: Aspects of Communication for Relationship - Essay Example

Letter of Advice Task: Kings University, P.O Box 2710-16th Avenue South, Minneapolis, MN  55407. Dear couple, I thank you for recognizing the need for enhancing communication in your relationship. It is a life-essential idea that you become engaged. This means that you will be spending substantial time together. Such time necessitates that a couple exercises proper communicating skills in order that the same becomes beneficial for both of you. In addition, it determines the length of your relationship. Good communication tips are indispensible in constructive relationships (Allen, 2002). Proper communication skills enable one in effectively conveying one’s feelings, thoughts and information that are crucial for building an interpersonal experience. It is important to note of the barriers that hinder effective communication and relationships. Most barriers in communication stem from self-protection. However, there are unavoidable circumstances, especially, if partners come from backgrounds that possess disparity (Wood, 2012). The intensity of the situation regards the level of disparity. The crucial thing for partners is that they realize these differences. In turn, they should be aware of how the same affects their communication. Individuals possess fears and insecurities that hinder one from wholly experiencing the benefits of a relationship. The light thing about these fears is that people learn about the same. This comes from the fact that partners may fear judgment from the same. Besides, they fear ridicule and appearing stupid in front of partners. This fear is coupled comes with the view that someone is sensitive of being overpowered. In this sense, fear impairs communication in notable ways. To begin with, a partner would not communicate true thoughts because one preempts what the other partner would like. This creates a situation where an individual stifles one’s emotions and thoughts. Another barrier of proper communication concerns with the case of insensitivity. It relates to inadequate care for a partner’s feelings. In addition, it entails inaccurate perception and portrayal of one’s feelings (Allen, 2002). It relates to detachment of an individual in the relationship until one becomes only preoccupied with oneself. It articulates as a case of personal insulation. Insensitivity expresses in notable ways. For instance, it comes as a method of diverting others’ concerns. In typical instances, one would turn a mutual conversation towards oneself. It deviates from the person who engages in talking. This occurs when a partner does not have proper listening skills. In certain instances, it comes as a method of attracting attention to oneself. Besides, a partner may experience discomfort out of a conversation. A prominent scenario in such situation regards the fact that partners might not be aware of the same. Additionally, assumptions can be momentous barriers to effective communication. In such instances, information that is sent articulates in a different way for the receiver. This creates misunderstanding that hampers the whole relationship. A typical example regards utilizing signs in communication with the belief that the other partner would understand. Furthermore, labeling and judging makes a significant obstacle to communication. In many communication instances, a partner gains control of situations by name-calling. On the other end, judging may consist of praising. Both of the situations do not create adequate scenarios for objective interpretation and response to messages. In terms of listening, it is essential for partners to realize that the same goes beyond hearing. In this sense, partners should involve ears, hearts and minds. Partners must be ready to exert efforts in listening. The first step is mindfulness in the same. It involves full presence in communication. This involves striving to understand the other person without imposing one’s thoughts, ideas and feelings (Wood, 2012). Mindful listening involves adopting the perspective of another person. It builds a dual perspective to communication. Mindfulness helps in building a partner’s communication. This is because one attains the platform of full expression of oneself. The positive thing about the same regards the fact that it does not rely on a unique talent. Each partner can adopt the initiative of being mindful to the other. There are practical concepts in building effective communication through mindful listening. This entails active listening whereby each partner makes effort to understand the other individual’s message. There are five tips in achieving dual hearing whereby the other partner knows that they are being heard. To begin with, active listening should involve paying attention to a conversation. One should accord a speaker undivided attention. In this sense, one acknowledges the message. In addition, it involves recognizing the aspects of non-verbal communication. According to this tip, one should directly look at a speaker. In addition, an individual should keep away from distracting thoughts (Congress & Gonzalez, 2005). A partner should engage one’s mind to the extent that it faces minimal distraction from the environment. In close relation to the same, a listening partner should pay attention to a speaker’s body communication. Besides, one should keep away from side conversations during listening activity. Lastly, it is vital for a listening partner not to prepare a rebuttal during a communication session. The second tip in listening regards the view that a partner should show that one is doing the same. A partner should utilize gestures and body language to convey one’s attention. For instance, one should nod occasionally during a communication session. Additionally, smiles and employment of other facial expressions can be essential in the same. It is crucial that a partner notes one’s posture. This is because they should be open and be able to express amiability. Verbal comments such as huh and yes are, additionally, vital in ensuring effective listening (Congress & Gonzalez, 2005). Additionally, provision of feedback is essential in communication. There are personal filters, judgments, assumptions and beliefs that distort whatever people hear. To begin with, one should reflect on a message by paraphrasing. For instance, one should seek a partner’s interpretation of a message. Questions are also vital for clarification of a speaker’s message. Additionally, a partner may periodically summarize a speaker’s thoughts. A listening partner should seek whether a partner is intending a personal or a general statement. The fourth tip exists in deferring judgments. Interruptions waste time that could be useful in full expression of oneself. It limits adequate interpretation of one’s message and frustrates a speaker. In this sense, a listening partner should allow the other to finish before reacting to one’s message. It is also vital not to interrupt with counterarguments. The fifth listening tip relates to this idea. In listening, one gains information and develops a perspective. A listening partner should engage respect and avoid personal attack on the other individual. In this sense, one should respond with objectivity and necessary sincerity. It is vital that an individual be candid and open in one’s response. Additionally, one should consider respect in expressing one’s opinions. In terms of dual perspective, it is vital that one treats the other partner in the way that one expects the same. In terms of interpersonal conflict, it is essential to note that the same is healthy. This is because it helps to understand and discover certain things about the other partner. It also uncovers hidden strains in relationships. An essential factor in conflicts regards self-disclosure. Self-disclosure should exist in adequate amounts for a healthy relationship (Hargie, 2006). A partner should identify information that is crucial for the relationship in a disclosure. However, it is essential that partners learn to solve conflicts in the sense that they do not destroy relationships. Conflicts involve struggles that base on incompatible goals. In this article, it is relevant to provide communication tips of managing and resolving conflicts. For instance, one can utilize the defusing technique whereby an individual initially agrees with the other partner. The underlying reason for this skill concerns the view that there must be elements of truth for one’s anger. This elevates conflict resolution to the platform of logical argument. Additionally, one should empathize with the other partner. This involves seeing through a partner’s eyes. It is vital for manifestation of understanding. In addition, a partner may employ exploration skills in imploring about the other’s thoughts. This should involve encouraging the other partner in full expression of one’s thoughts. In close relation to the same, one should use the ‘I’ statements for manifestation of personal responsibility to a conflict. Lastly, one should strive to highlight positive things about the other partner. In summary, this letter is vital for you in the sense that it explores aspects of communication for your relationship. To begin with, it uncovers the barriers to effective communication. In addition, it identifies listening tips for your relationship. Listening stands out as an activity that involves mindfulness. It also highlights how words have the ability to affect multiple situations. In addition, it explores communication skills for resolving conflicts in your relationship. In terms of conflict, it identifies that disclosure should limit to issues that affect and are crucial for the relationship. Yours faithfully, M@as, Graham Bell. References Allen, M. (2002). Interpersonal communication research: advances through meta-analysis. Mahwah, NJ: Routledge. Congress, E., & González, M. (2005). Multicultural perspectives in working with families. New York, NY: Springer Publishing Company. Hargie, O. (2006). The handbook of communication skills. New York, NY: Taylor & Francis. Wood, J. (2012). Interpersonal communication: everyday encounters. Mason, OH: Cengage Learning. Read More